Archive for joy

Honouring The Divine Masculine

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on August 27, 2018 by tivaniam

There’s an unspoken truth we’ve turned a blind eye to. Which I’m not prepared to remain quiet about any longer. I’ve personally witnessed the destruction this lie has amassed and I’ve seen many spirits break as a result.

The lie I refer to is the way in which we’ve been taught to regard men and the standard in which we’ve upheld them. By “we” I mean society at large. I am not a feminist or fascist in any way or form. My advocacy has always been about truth, authenticity and conscious living. My personal belief is that men and women form part of the same energetic frequency with both masculine and feminine energies. But we’ve been taught to differentiate and prescribe certain roles and responsibilities on to men, exacerbated by antiquated stories of men saving damsels in distress.

We’ve all bought into the bullshit, and hyped it further with sayings like “cowboys don’t cry”. We’ve placed the responsibility of providing financially squarely on the shoulders of men. We defined success for them as a way to measure up. We’ve defined the meaning of a “real man” according to a carefully crafted script. We’ve negated their emotional wellbeing and suppressed their innate ability to nurture or comfort because it wasn’t the “manly” thing to do. We’ve given them the responsibility of taking care of our emotional wellbeing and blamed them for our unhappiness. We’ve used religion or posterity, loyalty and obligation as control mechanisms to get them to conform. We’ve scoffed at their desire to be vulnerable because boys don’t cry. And “real men” don’t behave like sissies. And what we’ve done is create very angry and very sad men who feel isolated, scared and depressed. But they’d rather kill themselves than ever admit their truth. And so they do. The recent spate of suicides by men bears testament.

So what are we doing here and why are we doing it?

The simple answer is conditioning.

As an Indian woman I’ve seen many men aspire to become the vision that was set out for them by their parents. Often this vision had absolutely nothing to do with who they truly were, but they executed that vision to satisfy their parents. They negated their truths out of duty and obligation. I’ve also been a witness to men who wanted to express their pain and yet had to suppress it, which suppression translates into anger.

It’s time we create a new context. There is no men versus women here. It’s men AND women working together towards a collective consciousness. That is the only time we can move forward as a species. These gender specific roles are an illusion. We are all exactly the same. Honouring the divine masculine means honouring parts of ourselves as women. As a collective. There’s no differentiation. There are NO templates to follow that govern how men ought to be.

Beloved masculine, today I invite you to hold a mirror up and take a stark look at yourself. Begin to embrace the real truth and not the bullshit you’ve been fed about how you’re supposed to be. Recognise the courage it takes to be vulnerable and break down those barriers to love. Speak and own your truth. Know that your power is inherent and doesn’t need to be wielded forcefully. Understand that you don’t need to win approval from anyone. Understand that love is not conditional upon what you can provide or who you need to impress. Understand that you have the power to create your own reality. Own the fact that you CAN choose yourself and your happiness. Most importantly, break down the stereotypes and free yourself. It’s okay to exhale.

I honour the divine in You, as part of Me.


Vision – 2016

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , on January 18, 2016 by tivaniam

Dear 2016

Eighteen days in and all this?? You’ve been kind to me. Let’s create a lasting impression and maintain a level of consistency with the good vibrations. Let’s be friends huh?

I have to admit, I’ve been somewhat agreeable so I’ve played my part. I’ve decided that there won’t be a loss of awareness beyond name and form. I’ve decided to remain in the present moment. I’ve decided to stop majoring in minor things…converted knowledge for wisdom, you know?

And I suppose when the student is ready the teacher will appear. And she’s appeared. She looks oddly like me, except she has the trilogy of human endowments down to a peg: mind, body and soul in sync. The Being within me that’s formless.

I’ve decided that consciousness is more than just adding some spiritual sounding concepts to the content of my mind. I plan on fully getting to the truth of who I really am. Not in quantitative terms of more Facts but in the qualitative dimension of Depth.

The last few years have been the utter collapse of a mentally defined meaning and has become a call to a higher order. So, 2016, let’s not pursue intelligence in the service of madness anymore. Let’s allow for my external reality to reflect my inner state, which right now is a state of Ananda – the bliss of being.

Let’s get it right this time. I promise to Give in order to Receive because I know abundance, in all things, come to those who already have it.

And fuck. I do!!

I always have.


Tell Me Who You Are

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , on April 13, 2015 by tivaniam

I’m revealed to the world as a foolish woman who’s over-enthusiastic in love. I reach out with both hands open again and again and even after every failure, I know I have learnt more about love in all its expansiveness. I am drawn into the depths of real intimacy and get closer to the Divine due to my willingness. It’s a union of contradictory longings. And I will play the fool again. And again.

I’ve learnt how to deal with pain. There is no way out – but through. Trying to anaesthetise it through drugs, alcohol, sex or food consumes us from the inside. Some days all I can do is simply hold on, one breath at a time. So I learnt to sit with pain and in it I find continued wisdom.

I’ve learnt that joy finds itself in ordinary moments. Quite often these ordinary moments of ecstacy feels like a spiritual awakening, it’s so transformative. A shared joke with someone I love, remembering our naughtiness and three words that landed us in trouble, sparked an avalanche of belly aching laughter. It was a moment of unbridled joy, all encompassing. I savour those moments even if it appears to others to be simplistic because life has taught us to pick a set of joys that suit a lifestyle.

I used to downplay my talent for writing despite spending years trying to cultivate it, just so that I could appear humble but I can’t do it anymore. I derive such joy in this ability. I derive joy in my inabilities too. I love music and I sing loudly, and very badly, at full volume. I sing because it alters my mood without me resorting to medication.

I am inefficient in so many areas but I know that I was made to write and I was made to love. This is my joy and it’s limitless.

I’ve told you who I am. Tell me who you are. I don’t want to hear your name…

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